First shoot in a while

Livnius

Top Veteran
Location
Melbourne. Australia
Real Name
Joe
Been a while since I've gone out and shot, health issues have kinda put a dampener on things for me in recent months.

About 3 months ago I started getting headaches/dizzy spells and chest pains and a general feeling of great unease and of 'things' just not being quite right......naturally concerned I went to the doctors and did a series of scans on my brain and heart, 7 in total including CT scans, MRIs, EEGs, ECGs plus 3 blood tests. Thankfully everything has come through clear, I must admit it was horrifying when I looked at my referrals from the Neurologist and noticed many of my scans were to be conducted at the main cancer hospital here in Melbourne....for months I feared the worst. Like I said, I've got the all clear from the tests so we are beginning to shift our thinking....and our best guess at the moment is that in recent months what I've been suffering from is Anxiety. I've had to stop work and enlist the help of friends and family to support me through this, this is something new to me (I've always been super mellow and chilled) and I'm having to learn to get on top of these new feelings and emotions. There is much I have to learn and no doubt have a long way to go to effectively manage this thing.

Was great to get away the other weekend with a few friends, get away from all of this and change things up a little. We went up to Falls Creek, an annual trip where us guys, all old friends, take our sons fishing up in alpine country for the weekend. It was REALLY great to be able to get out there and shoot a little after what felt like so long away from a camera, I certainly didn't shoot as much as I normally would on trip like this....photography has been something that I haven't had the will or energy to indulge in as much as usual in recent months. I hope with time as my health improves so does my will to shoot.

Here are a few of my snaps from that weekend.
My kit worked out quite well I think.....a little GR, the main shooter RX1 and the EM5 with Pana35-100 to cover my tele stuff. In my bag I had the O9-18, PL25 and O45 at the ready but found the GR or RX1 in tandem with the EM5 + P35-100 had me covered in this case.


Joe.




With the Ricoh GR.


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Falls Creek Weekend 02 by Livnius, on Flickr


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Falls Creek Weekend 03 by Livnius, on Flickr









With the RX1


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Falls Creek Weekend 08 by Livnius, on Flickr


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Falls Creek Weekend 09 by Livnius, on Flickr


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Falls Creek Weekend 04 by Livnius, on Flickr


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Falls Creek Weekend 05 by Livnius, on Flickr


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Falls Creek Weekend 11 by Livnius, on Flickr


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Falls Creek Weekend 06 by Livnius, on Flickr


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Falls Creek Weekend 13 by Livnius, on Flickr








With the EM5 and Pana 35-100


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Falls Creek Weekend 01 by Livnius, on Flickr


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Falls Creek Weekend 10 by Livnius, on Flickr


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Falls Creek Weekend 12 by Livnius, on Flickr





I really love this portrait, missed focus and all....the kid is just so happy and in the moment, makes me smile just looking at this shot.


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Falls Creek Weekend 07 by Livnius, on Flickr


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Falls Creek Weekend 14 by Livnius, on Flickr


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Falls Creek Weekend 15 by Livnius, on Flickr
 

TheRubySusan

Top Veteran
Location
Henry, IL
Real Name
Ruby
Great set! I especially like 03, where you can see the rocks through the waves on the bottom edge, and 13, where the sunflare makes the fishing rod look magic.

All my best to you with your health challenges - it often doesn't look like it to others, but anxiety's as real as a broken bone.
 

Lawrence A.

Hall of Famer
Location
New Mexico
Real Name
Larry
Wonderful set. It must have been great to get into such beautiful country.

I hope all is on the way up for you. I suffered a series of debilitating depressions at one point, over a lengthy period, and it was very physical. I felt taken over, body and soul: Aches and fatigue, no ability to concentrate; I felt like I was carrying around an extra 500 lbs. Just to move took such enormous effort. Stay with friends who understand, or who maybe don't understand but support you. Avoid like the plague anyone who tries to make it a moral issue.

Good luck. I hope you keep shooting; your work is very good. But don't make it an obligation; that will muck everything up.
 

kyteflyer

~@¿@~
Location
Newcastle, Australia
Real Name
Sue
Thanks guys.

@Ruby.....I think I'm still coming to terms with the idea that something which is essentially a mental/emotional condition can manifest itself into real physical symptoms.

Oh Joe, I am so glad you don't have any dread diseases, and so sorry you've had to go through this emotional crap. Been there, its horrible. Your photographs seem to indicate a moving into the light again, Its a lovely set. Is that your son? Whats his name?
 

bilzmale

Hall of Famer
Location
Perth, Western Australia
Real Name
Bill Shinnick
As others have said Joe these are all great photos. Yes, anxiety is very real and led to me taking early retirement some 13 years ago. I also have been advised 3 months ago that I have Parkinson's and haven't touched a camera since. Don't mean to steal your thunder but your post is starting to make me itch to get shooting again so thanks.

All the best to you for a speedy recovery.
 

Ray Sachs

Legend
Location
Not too far from Philly
Real Name
you should be able to figure it out...
Welcome back Joe - lots of good life-energy in those photos - you've still got that side working too, even if it's tough to find it some days. Life throws a lot of unpleasant crap at you - I'm in the midst of a couple of things right now too, though not as crippling as anxiety can be. But when I think back to the physical specimen I still was as little as 3-4 years ago, I don't like where I am now at all. Just have to cope with the bad stuff as well as we can and then to enjoy and appreciate the good stuff to the max...

Hang in there buddy,

-Ray
 

Luckypenguin

Hall of Famer
Location
Brisbane, Australia
Real Name
Nic
Hey Joe,

I couldn't say that I know what you are going through so I won't. I think that I first picked up a camera as a semi-therapeutic activity and to some extent it is still the same to this day. The images in this thread show how much of a naturally gifted photographer you are, and I hope that that belief can help in some small way to keep you in a good headspace. Great work, as always.
 

Livnius

Top Veteran
Location
Melbourne. Australia
Real Name
Joe
Thank you all so much for the kind words and support.....it actually took a surprising amount of effort to post these images, it's strange how something previously so simple can become so complicated when ones headspace feels cloudy and overwhelmed. I believe I have the tools, both mental and emotional, to overcome this with time and having good friends and family like I do will also help me along. It seems the most important first step is not only to recognise the problem but to also begin talking about it with family and friends, in some way the act of opening up about it can ease the load...I guess thats probably why I've brought it up here with you guys, I 'hang out' with you guys so to speak in this little village of photography nuts we have here. All the material I've read suggests that facing up to it and being open about it, talking rather than suffering in silence, is apparently an important part of overcoming Anxiety. Photography can be, and is for me, a creative way of communicating...I'm glad that my images can still convey warmth and good energy and I hope they can still speak in that way for many years to come. Thanks again guys.





All the best from this side of the pond.
Thanks mate.





Wonderful set. It must have been great to get into such beautiful country.

I hope all is on the way up for you. I suffered a series of debilitating depressions at one point, over a lengthy period, and it was very physical. I felt taken over, body and soul: Aches and fatigue, no ability to concentrate; I felt like I was carrying around an extra 500 lbs. Just to move took such enormous effort. Stay with friends who understand, or who maybe don't understand but support you. Avoid like the plague anyone who tries to make it a moral issue.

Good luck. I hope you keep shooting; your work is very good. But don't make it an obligation; that will muck everything up.

Thanks so much for the support Larry...I can relate to much of what you've written here, many of your thoughts here echo my own.







Oh Joe, I am so glad you don't have any dread diseases, and so sorry you've had to go through this emotional crap. Been there, its horrible. Your photographs seem to indicate a moving into the light again, Its a lovely set. Is that your son? Whats his name?

Thank you Sue. That handsome little fella isn't mine...I'm his godfather and best mates with his old man.





As others have said Joe these are all great photos. Yes, anxiety is very real and led to me taking early retirement some 13 years ago. I also have been advised 3 months ago that I have Parkinson's and haven't touched a camera since. Don't mean to steal your thunder but your post is starting to make me itch to get shooting again so thanks.

All the best to you for a speedy recovery.

Many thanks Bill. I always thought Anxiety was simply about 'feeling overly stressed'...I've come to realise that it is a whole lot more than I'd ever imagined. Good luck with your own battles mate, I'd be happy to think that you'll take a few snaps again soon too.





Welcome back Joe - lots of good life-energy in those photos - you've still got that side working too, even if it's tough to find it some days. Life throws a lot of unpleasant crap at you - I'm in the midst of a couple of things right now too, though not as crippling as anxiety can be. But when I think back to the physical specimen I still was as little as 3-4 years ago, I don't like where I am now at all. Just have to cope with the bad stuff as well as we can and then to enjoy and appreciate the good stuff to the max...

Hang in there buddy,

-Ray

Mate, this is one of those things that I'll have to deal with as best I can like say, in some shape or form we all have to face lives challenges and Anxiety to some extent appears to be one of mine...I think that just like everyone else all I can hope for is that I have a lot more good days than bad.





Hey Joe,

I couldn't say that I know what you are going through so I won't. I think that I first picked up a camera as a semi-therapeutic activity and to some extent it is still the same to this day. The images in this thread show how much of a naturally gifted photographer you are, and I hope that that belief can help in some small way to keep you in a good headspace. Great work, as always.

Cheers Nic. There was a few days there a couple of weeks back where I honestly though 'oh **** this, **** everything' and considered selling off all my gear, my head felt just too overwhelmed with 'stuff' and for a brief moment thought getting rid of my gear would unclog it in some way...but that wouldn't have worked, in fact it would have been counter productive for I too got into photography for some of the same reasons you did too. I enjoy it way too much, from walking around looking for the shot to post processing and even sharing with like minded photography nuts like you guys here...I will however take Larry's advice and not try force it. Photography has been an overwhelmingly positive influence on my life ad I hope it remains so for many years to come.
 

serhan

Hall of Famer
Location
NYC
Welcome back. All the shots are very good esp the portraits are lovely. I took 3 shots of my friends daughter last weekend, first one was not posed and I missed the focus but it was the best w/ the expression on her face. Still it looked fine on the screen w/o pixel peeping. Other shots were pixel sharp but missed the expression... I am sure we'll see more of your shots soon:)
 

TheRubySusan

Top Veteran
Location
Henry, IL
Real Name
Ruby
As others have said Joe these are all great photos. Yes, anxiety is very real and led to me taking early retirement some 13 years ago. I also have been advised 3 months ago that I have Parkinson's and haven't touched a camera since. Don't mean to steal your thunder but your post is starting to make me itch to get shooting again so thanks.

All the best to you for a speedy recovery.

Scratch that itch!
 

TheRubySusan

Top Veteran
Location
Henry, IL
Real Name
Ruby
Thanks guys.

@Ruby.....I think I'm still coming to terms with the idea that something which is essentially a mental/emotional condition can manifest itself into real physical symptoms.

So many people feel that we're "a ghost in a machine," and by God, the machine was going to serve the ghost. I think we're a system, and that it's useless to try to figure out what's more 'real" - the intellectual? the emotional (more of which is neurological than we really understand as yet)? the physical? They all work together, and we work with what we've got. That's where I am after 4 years of slowly developing chronic fatigue syndrome, anyway!

But you're right, the "Message" we've all been raised with is that if it isn't caused by an outside force (like a virus or a cancer) or an injury, it isn't "real," we're just lacking in willpower.It's hard to contradict a message you've absorbed all your life, and it doesn't come in the blink of an eye. All my best to you!
 

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